When I Couldn't Call My Daughter "Dude"

When we visited the fountain
in nineteen-sixy-seven and went
to the Electric Circus,
when they told us about lasers
and that women would be wearing
boring mens clothes because unisex
was here I was not outraged but
disappointed. It was like
going without breakfast.

Now to me a "dude" is an man
from an Eastern city who sojurns
to the uncivilized West, maybe
visiting a ranch. My mind,
content in its categories sees
the pants, the dust on the boots,
the uncomfortably worn Stetson.
I could live with calling all men"
dude." But when my daughter who lives
in Vancouver said that I must
address her as "dude" because
all women are called "dude" now,
I got stomach cramps.